Why you should not wear a bikini on the beach

So we're well ensconced on our family vacation. I've got WonderDad, Wonderboy, The Alligator, WonderGramma, WonderPapa, WonderGrammy and WonderGrampy all with me. The other day I was sitting on the beach with the Alligator. I was wearing a bikini. It's not too showy. It's got a halter top and a bottom that's big enough to make sure that my butt is fully covered. The Alligator and I were sitting in the surf just letting the waves wash up on us. Suddenly I realized that it felt like I had a just taken a big poo in my bikini bottom. Now of course I didn't! But all that sand had started washing itself up into my bottoms. WonderGramma said that I should go out into the ocean and rinse off. I tried but the sand had actualy worked itself into the inner liner of the suit. Yeah. So I tried as gracefully as possible to leave the beach and change my suit. That suit has now been designated as pool only!